The Stone and The Wind
by TheTilly
Summary: AU/OOC/Character Death. Arthur never thought Merlin wouldn't be there. It just didn't seem right. Arthur now has to face the world knowing Merlin is no longer in it. T for blood and death. Complete? If reviewed enough may continue.


AN: This was written at 3 in the morning after watching a VERY sad video on youtube called 'Sad Romance'. It was about Merlin dying and Arthur trying to deal with it.

**The Stone and the Wind**

The Knights were worried for Arthur. His expression had not changed. It was as though he turned to stone.

Merlin, the manservant and possibly only true friend of Arthur's, was dead. His chest was punctured with a hole the size of a fist. He received it when pushing Arthur out of the way of a stray lance during a hunt. He hadn't even said good bye to anyone. Merely, lay lifeless on the ground.

Arthur had stared for nearly a minute in silence. None of the Knights spoke up or moved. They were not sure what to expect. They were not prepared for this. Arthur had sheathed his sword soundlessly as he approached Merlin. He continued to have the same expressionless stare as he gathered Merlin's frail body into his arms. Not even a grunt from picking him up escaped his lips. He turned on his heel and walked to the horses. He carefully loaded Merlin onto his horse, then approached the giant boar they have slain for the hunt. He began to clean and prepare the boar for travel.

The Knights had past looks to each other. The oldest of the Knights, Sir Ester came forward and helped his Prince. Slowly, all the knights joined in, cleaning the prey. They did so in silence.

Once the kill was loaded to each horse, Arthur mounted his horse and gathered Merlin's body to himself. Without a word, he headed back.

It had been two weeks since Arthur came back to Camelot with Merlin... Arthur refused to call him a 'body'. It- he... he wasn't. He had wrapped Merlin in his cloak and carried him across his lap, holding Merlin's head to his chest the whole way. He wouldn't leave Merlin alone for a second. If Merlin happened to have woken up or if he had gotten lost... leave it to Merlin to have his body wander off when Arthur was gone...

Arthur shook his head. He didn't want to replay the look on Gwen's face as he handed Merlin over to Gaius. He didn't want to hear the wail of the old man, carrying the closest thing he ever had to a son... He didn't want to remember the accusations of bringing his servant on a hunt. He blocked out the argument he had with his Father about the blood on his shirt. He chose to forget when he explained what had happened to Gwen. The hurt on her face and the expectation of his tears. He could not find a single ounce of strength in his body to comfort her in her pain.

Arthur had kept to himself since then. He refused to leave his chambers, even when Merlin was being buried, and only picked at his food. His eyes had developed bags below them and his shirts were never clean now a days. He was surprised when Gwen, who came to his door in anger that he had missed funeral, she had stopped dead in her tracks when she spotted him.

Instead of slapping him, like she had probably planned to do, she had merely told him he should have a good long cry. She had even offered him her shoulder. He had to admit he felt a tad bit bad about shutting the door in her face, but he couldn't muster up any words for her.

There are so few times in which Arthur has ever cried. There was the time he had skinned his knee when trying to show off to the knights back when he was three, that was probably the earliest he could remember. There were a few times between then and now, mainly being in his younger years and once when he had nearly killed his own Father over the death of his mother. He tried very hard to remember every single time he did and he found he could count it on one hand. To put it rather shortly, Arthur Pendragon did not cry.

When he finally allowed himself to leave his chambers and saw the small stone with Merlin's name written in tiny scrawl as though it should be there, he forgot he wasn't supposed to cry.

"You're so stupid _Mer_lin!" Arthur wailed, dropping to his knees. "How could you... after facing a dragon! _A Dragon_ Merlin!"

It was then he felt the rage. It was as though a dam had been broken inside of him. He felt himself looking at the stone as though it were Merlin, as though if he just explained how stupid this whole thing was, Merlin would have to come back. Somehow, the world would see this injustice and it would be righted.

"I mean, I've met some complete idiots but _you_," Arthur huffed, pointing at the stone, "You are by far the single, biggest_ idiot_ ever! Who dies by a lance in a boar hunt? Tell me Merlin!"

He raised his hands to the sky, refusing the acknowledge the tears streaming down or the unpleasant snot coming from his nose. He felt the wind kick up around him, almost knocking him over. He stood up and dug his heels into the earth, shouting at the stone that dared to just sit in silence when he felt enraged.

"I mean, really _Mer_lin! You survive a battle with farmers to defend your home, battle magical beasts when you barely know which end of a sword to hold, somehow survive against a Warlock, and help battle a Dragon to save Camelot but THIS! THIS hunt is what offs you?! A stupid hunting trip and a lance?!"

Arthur stared at the stone as though expecting a response from it. It glared back with 'Merlin' written on it. Arthur could almost feel the stare of two blue eyes coming from it. He felt himself prickle up and glare right back at it. He felt the wind stop but knew it was merely waiting to knock him over if he backed down.

"You know, I should get a boot licker just to spite you," Arthur said, crossing his arms over his chest. He heard the distant howl of the wind in complaint, but he continued. "I could go across every boarder to find the biggest one. He would do everything I said, when I said it and maybe get the chores done on time unlike you."

Arthur let out a humorless laugh. The stone sat in still silence and even the distant wind stopped. The longer the silence went on the more Arthur found his voice finally ebbing away and all the rage leaving. He knelled down with a sigh then moved forward and brushed a bit of dirt from the stone away. It seemed to shine a bit more against the sunlight now that it was clean. A fresh stone in good soil. A small smile worked its way onto his face.

"You're right," he said, still with a small smile on his face. "You know I won't do that. And you already know I forgive you for being an idiot."

He sat back on his heels and took a deep breath. He felt the breeze against his cheeks, as it dried his tears, causing his face to chill. He felt the caress of the wind twirling his hair around his neck and gently cleaning the wetness from his face.

When he opened his eyes, the sun was lower in the sky. The stone was now basking in an orange color due to the sun set and the name was shadowed over, barely visible. Arthur found himself putting both hands on either side of the stone as he gently leaned forward. He placed a kiss on the top and patted the sides. He could see the pale pink from the sun shine on the stone now as the sun was getting ready to finally set.

"I promise you Merlin," Arthur spoke quietly, "I won't be a prat."

Silence was all he got in response. He stood up gingerly, not caring about brushing the dirt from his britches, as he made hi way towards the castle.

He found his walk more enjoyable than it had been in weeks as he viewed the people moving about. Somehow, for the first time he felt with one with the people around him. He had helped a woman who dropped some food when she tripped, he helped an old man load his cart with wood for his house, and he fetched a toy from a roof for a child. With each deed, he felt a gentle breeze blow across his neck and cool his body.

Somehow, he knew, his idiot of a manservant would make him keep his promise.


End file.
